He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Randomize
