just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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