your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
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hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
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I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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