so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
