: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
