I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Randomize
