i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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