i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
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