She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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