Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.