There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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