I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
