Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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