It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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