i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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