He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
