tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
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