Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
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