ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Randomize
