It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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