# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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