Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Randomize
