I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize