ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
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