he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize