YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
