This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Randomize
