What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I just gargled with NyQuil
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Randomize