whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
