the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
Randomize
