drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
