Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize