honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
