So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
