Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
