I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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