is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
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