Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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