I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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