Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
