hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
This house was built for laser tag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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