she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
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i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
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