Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize