Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize