just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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