It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
