my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize
