i would punch a child for taco bell
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
