Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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