Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize