What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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