so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize
